Help me mister wizard! Buster, Jerky and I have landed in another part of SE Portland, more outward from downtown.
I accepted all that this place is because I felt that we could live here, I can adjust, am aware that adjustment is needed. Anything of living situation for a dog and cat accompanying an aging man.
These guys also accepted me to their home. They are two single guys a 39 year old studying to be a nurse and a 53 year old disabled veteran. He just told me of his years of service in the Navy aboard DD 984 a forgot class destroyer. He is disabled and they have been living together since October of last year. His room mate has been trying to get him to so something besides sit and watch TV. I got home from work today, between runs something that I have had tome to do today only this week and he was watching TV on the big set. I have done all sorts of chores, etc. and he still just sits and comments on and watches TV. He has pain and he has been sober in AA for about 21 years, trouble is though he is on a lot of drugs and the reactions he has to the TV strikes me as someone who is heavily medicated. His talking to the TV leads me to believe this to be some of the evidence.
I know that I can only do what I do and lead by example, yet, I suggested to him that all three of us get together and have a house meeting to discuss the common areas and to prevent mole hills from becoming mountains of resentment etc.
This morning, I woke up the other character and he pointed out right then that the sound of the fan and my stirring of my coffee with a metal spoon banging on the side of the cup broke him abruptly out of his sleep! He told me right then and there not to do those things. He has no problem letting me know what bugs him, where as I struggle with it, hence I want to have an airing out session. Hopefully, they will be able to schedule something once in a while to deal with issues.
I so have a problem with the other buy not putting his things up or washing his dishes and leav ing them scattered about the kitchen and house. He is assertive, but to the point of really causing me to just put up and shut up which is so unhealthy.
So, I have to return to work, just needed to write this, vent, because the pressure is building up and I will probably have to start getting on my knees or where ever and pray for God's will and the power to carry it out without being a door mat or enabler.
God luck with opening a healthy dialogue so you can all go forward respecting each others needs and wants. You're doing the right thing to try and have an expectation setting session right from the outset. With any luck you can all go on to become friends.
ReplyDeleteI mean good luck
ReplyDelete